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The Hairy Fish Dish

(Now the story of restaurateur Patrick Bergeron

And the quest for the perfect dish

For his restaurant.)




And when one day he asked my advice

I sat back to smile a smile wise

Then I said ‘easily done and I’ll tell you if you insist

The perfect cuisine is the Hairy Fish Dish.’



To this Patrick exclaimed

‘A hairy fish? why there’s no such thing, of which I’ve never heard

Really it sounds like something from a Dr. Seuss story

Truly, truly rather absurd!’



So I said ‘ Patrick, Patrick, Patrick’ I said

‘To see a hairy fish is rare

It’s rare to see a fish with hair

But that doesn’t mean they don’t exist

Those rarely seen hairy fish.



Few have ever seen one

Many look everywhere and in between

But it comes as no surprise

For to see one with your own two eyes

Is quite a sight unseen.



Please allow me to declare

‘One should always be aware

Without caution and particular care

You will be seduced by the amphibious flair

To which belongs a fish with hair’



They say a hairy fish can charm a sailor

Salute a soldier dress a tailor

They could knock the shocks off Orson Welles

With poetry about their dead skin cells.



Yes many a word has been spared

in reference to the fish whose haired

throughout time deep into history

when first discovered this mystery.



I believe it was Plato who first did write

‘Today I received quite a fright,

on walking with a student fair and great

and deep in thought and open debate

low and behold a marvelous sight.’



‘Beyond the trees so tall and grand,

Upon the hills where those trees stand

A vision complete and wondrous fair

A fish with long and luxurious hair.’



And since it would be true to say

That from then on until today

The sightings have been few and far between.

Yes a hairy fish is rarely seen.



I’ve even tried to eat one

To your presumptuous disgust

It was tough and thick and bits of it

Were always getting stuck inbetween my teeth

Onthetop and underneath



I crunched and spat

And chewed the fat

Let’s just say with salt it’s best

it's easier to digest.



They visit you in your dreams

Can hear your deepest wish

Yes it’s possible to see

A rarely seen hairy fish.’



Now Patrick sat back and put on his hat and said after a spell

‘OK enough of that!

I cannot stomach a hairy fish dish for Goodness sake!

But listen here, what think you of a hairy fish milkshake?’




words: Belinda Suzette

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